Asheville, Here I Come (Gulp!)

Posted on May 27, 2012 by

Full confession–it’s been easy for me to write on this blog about change while I sit comfortably in my home of roughly eleven years. I’ve had my fair share of major change in my life, but it’s been awhile since I have been faced with uprooting myself. In the blink of an eye, I remembered and re-lived the gripping fear that change can bring about.

I wrote in my latest post about the wild synchronicities that were pointing me to Asheville, NC, so last week I traveled there to check it out. I had a rough start–my emotions were high and my first impressions were different than what I had conjured up in my head. It takes me awhile to acclimate to a new place and I had forgotten this fact, until someone kindly pointed it out. The Sagittarius in me (my sun sign/my destiny) loves excitement and adventure, but the Taurus in me (my ascending and moon signs) loves being grounded and safe in my comfortable home surroundings. It was only last year during a soul contract reading with Katie Carlone, that I learned about the Taurus in my chart. It made so much sense! People with their moon in Taurus like the familiar, they like to feel secure and happy, and are resistant to change. We like to take our time.

Those first two days everything got clouded and inertia set it. You know the saying “You can’t see the forest for the trees”? Well, fortunately, my host, Linda, yanked me out of my coma, friend Randi let me tag along to search for houses, and my Taurus side looked around at the inexplicable beauty in and around Asheville and slowly started to fall in love.

I had angels with me on my journey–both the heavenly ones, who watched over me as I drove a car (more like a mini clown car) for the first time in years, and the ones here on earth. My new friend, David, helped me from a distance to discover this part of the country that he so dearly loves. He kept my anxiety in check with his humor and unbending compassionate support. And my friend, Vivi, well, she’s an earth angel if ever there was one. I’m convinced of it. She is pure light and love and she just kept me laughing so that I soon forgot my trepidation about relocating.

I can’t forget to mention the two Judys. There was GPS Judy, who navigated me around town accurately, in spite of having to say “Recalculating!” over and over again. And real-life, Judy, David’s friend, who graciously carted me around the area from morning til night, giving up her precious day off. We immediately felt like old friends. It was late afternoon when Judy sensed that my Asheville experience had been incomplete because I hadn’t yet stood solidly in nature. After all, that’s the major force that is pulling me there. So Judy tirelessly took me driving up into green heaven and parked the car near the French Broad River where I blissfully waded in and took photographs. Judy (Smith) is a photographer and took the photo of me in the river above.

Asheville and the surrounding area is breathtakingly beautiful. Nestled at the foot of the Blue Ridge Mountains, Mother Nature is in all her glory. I felt in sync with the people I met and the things they are passionate about. The arts are flourishing, local food is like a religion there, and the healing arts have a strong presence.

And built-in family, to boot! I visited with my long-lost cousin, Cork, his wife, Martha and my sweet, lovely 92 year-old Aunt Lil.

So then why did I have a meltdown on my last night? Back in my room, fear and anxiety gripped me. My mind took over, racing every which way. “I have to be out of my apartment by September 1st…when/how will I find a place to live? Is this the right decision? My precious routine and orderly life is going to be plunged into chaos for a few months.” You would think I was moving to another planet! Fortunately, after a good night’s sleep, my inner voice jumped in and reassured me that everything will work out just as it’s meant to. I had survived other big changes and after the dust settled, I always thrived. I will stay present and grounded and not let my Vata mind run rampant. As my Yogi tea tag stated the morning I left Asheville, “The mind is energy. Regulate it.”

So, I am heeding my own advice as I forge ahead on my journey, remembering the title to one of my collages–Change is Just a Six-Letter Word. No big deal. And for all the synchronicity that has pointed me to this spectacular healing part of the country, and led me to some amazing people, I say (as my  friend, David tells me they like to say in the South), thank you Jesus!

Posted in Anxiety, Change, General Wellness, Nature, Synchronicity, Travel | Tagged , , , , | 10 Comments

The Month of “Yes You May!”

Posted on May 2, 2012 by

Tra la! It’s May!
The lusty month of May!
That lovely month when everyone goes blissfully astray!

I can’t help myself. Every year as May 1st approaches, I find myself humming (or outright singing) The Lusty Month of May, the Lerner and Loewe song famously sung by Julie Andrews in the Broadway musical Camelot. I was only seven years old and the meaning behind the song was lost on me. But when the film version with Vanessa Redgrave came out in 1967, I was fourteen and totally smitten with her two co-stars, Richard Harris and Franco Nero. The song with the mildly naughty lyrics took on a whole new meaning for me!

For some people, spring might bring them together for festivals, romance, fun and frolicking. But for most of us, spring is simply about renewal. The trees come to life, flowers begin to bloom and all of nature comes alive again. And so should we. We are, after all, made of the same five elements as everything else on this planet–air, ether (space), earth, water and fire. So why should we be any different from the birds and the bees, the flowers and the trees?

In winter we go within to hibernate, germinate ideas, and fill our well. Now it’s time for those ideas to burst forth and put our plans into action.

For me, this has never seemed more obvious than this year. It will be one year on May 5th since Ralph passed away. I have traveled a lot, but I have also spent a lot of time in solitude, especially this past winter. I have sensed for a couple of years that my days in New York City were numbered. This city that used to energize me, now seems to deplete me. It was an integral part of my growth that nurtured my soul for many years. But I feel that it’s time for a new chapter to begin in my life.

After Ralph died, I began consciously asking the Universe, in all of her wisdom, to point me in the right direction–to give me a sign (or just to be sure, many signs). And point, she did!
About a year and a half ago, my friend Linda, from my energy medicine family, mentioned that she thought I would like living in her town of Asheville, North Carolina. A former New Yorker, Linda told me I had an open invitation to visit. Every now and then it would pop into my head, but I wasn’t actively pursuing it.

Well, if you are patient and take time to get quiet and listen, your intuition will take the reins. Mine certainly did and in a very short time the messages began to come fast and furiously. I kept hearing references to Asheville. When I described to my friend, Alissa the environment I pictured myself in–what city did she suggest? You got it–Asheville! And then there was the candy bar synchronicity. Yesterday I unwrapped a chocolate bar and saw that it was made in Asheville, NC! To top things off, my son and his girlfriend recently moved to Carey, NC, four hours from Asheville.

I have never been to Asheville, but I already feel a new chapter in my life is about to begin in the mountains of North Carolina. Call me impulsive, but this seems to me one of the sanest things I have ever planned.

Whatever it is you have been ruminating about all winter–a new job, location, relationship or creative project–I suggest that you take the time to tap into that source of inner wisdom that lies within each of us. Pay attention to synchronicities, relax and let it unfold. Meditation is by far the most effective way to tap into this knowing.

Life is all about change. When we become conscious observers without a sense of urgency, the unfolding of our life’s plan is truly miraculous to behold.

Here’s the song I can’t get out of my head. It’s dated, but I’m sure some of you out there will feel a little nostalgic!

Posted in Change, Change of Seasons, Inspiration, Meditation, Synchronicity | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments

Ask, and You Shall Receive

Posted on April 25, 2012 by

Oh, how I feel qualified to write about this topic! The old me was sooooo resistant to asking for help. I could do it myself. I could do it better. Everyone is too busy, and I don’t want to bother them. Blah, blah, blah. I was heavy on the giving, but not on the receiving end, and it was making me sick. Yes, physically sick. For over a year, I noticed that almost every health issue I had was on the right side of my body. Finally, it occured to me that this is the yang (of the yin and the yang) side, and has everything to do with giving, doing, pushing, expending energy, etc. There’s a place for all of this, but a healthy life needs balance, and I was neglecting my yin side, which is about receiving, resting, and nourishing ourselves.

This post is dedicated with deep love and gratitude to my friend/assistant, Alissa. I only use the word assistant because she refers to herself as such. For the longest time it would make me uncomfortable. I would giggle when I heard her say it, because really, who did I think I was to have an assistant? I met Alissa years ago when she was a college roommate of my friend’s daughter, Rachel, at NYU. When I graduated from the Institute for Integrative Nutrition, Rachel suggested that Alissa could help me organize my business, and so, for once, I let go of a little control and said yes. My life truly changed the day Alissa started to work with me. She’s a talented photographer and  has a very critical, creative eye which was so important to me. She helped me get organized, got my website up and running, and taught me how to manage it myself, so that I’m not dependent on her. (I’m about 60-70% proficient in this regard!) She understands my need to always have color and composition just right, and never makes me compromise myself. Alissa gets twice the work done in half the time.

But our work together often seems like a page out of The Cat in the Hat. More play than work. At least it does for me, and I think Alissa would agree. The thing is, I have yet to discover anything that Alissa can’t or won’t do, so when she shows up to work and says, “What are we doing today?”, anything is possible. Like the day she hung roller shades on my 11 ft. high windows. Or the time she helped me save my six ft. cactus from dying by hauling it into my bathtub to give it a good cleaning. (It survived.) Alissa was painting my big wall a beautiful shade of goldenrod yellow when the NYC earthquake shook my apartment. Thankfully, she had just climbed down off the ladder. She’s a great cook and can quickly whip up a healthy lunch in no time flat.

My mind was on Alissa when I wrote my last post titled Spring Cleaning–Inside and Out, because she was right there with me, helping me rip through my closets and purge what I needed to get rid of. Did you really think I did that all myself? Seriously? Alissa can be a bit merciless here, but I welcome her honesty and sense of keeping things simple. I crave organization, but don’t have good skills in this area. I call it my Vata-Pitta war, and the Vata usually wins out–my mind floating off in a completely different direction. Enter Alissa–she snaps me out of my Vata coma, and her organizational skills somehow rub off on me.

So, you’re probably thinking, “This may sound like fun for Barbara, but not for Alissa”. I know it’s her job, but I like to believe that I help to keep it from getting boring. One day, I taught her how to make a pie (mine are pretty awesome, I’ve been told), and she’s always privy to free energy work. We even had a field trip to Woodstock to spend the day with herbalist, Susun Weed. But the thing I can’t put a price on is the relationship that has grown between us. Some days she seems like a daughter and I’m nurturing her, other days her wisdom and common sense find me on the other side of the fence.

You certainly don’t need an assistant to allow yourself to receive. I guarantee there are people in your life willing to help you out at the drop of a hat, and not expecting a thing in return. In fact, I challenge you to let someone help you out without clamboring to even the score. (I have to stop myself from that life-long habit of “You gave me that, so I’ll give you this.”) Just take a deep breath and say those two precious words: thank you. Ditto for receiving things like love, affection, respect and praise.

I got pretty emotional writing this post because Alissa recently received her Master’s degree in Journalism, and is interviewing for a real job. I will miss her terribly. Whoever hires her will likely have no idea how lucky they are. They better treat her well. And Alissa, if it doesn’t work out, there’s always The Cat in the Hat Comes Back.

Posted in General Wellness, Self-Care | Tagged , , , , | 8 Comments

Spring Cleaning–Inside and Out

Posted on April 11, 2012 by

A couple of weeks ago I put the kettle on to boil some water for tea. I went to the sink to wash the dishes and was lost in my thoughts, when all of a sudden I smelled something burning. I turned around and saw the kettle engulfed in a huge flame. It took me a moment to register what was happening. I have a basket on top of my refrigerator filled with kitchen linens and an apron had fallen onto the stove and was on fire. I’m not proud of how poorly I reacted. I grabbed the section of the apron that wasn’t on fire and attempted to throw it in the sink. Not a good idea. Part of the flaming apron hit the cupboard which quickly caught on fire. I doused the apron in the sink with water, hit the cupboard with a wet cloth and breathed a sigh of relief. But wait! There was another little fire on the floor needing my attention. This all transpired in a matter of seconds and when it was over, surprisingly, I started to laugh.

Looking at the charred mess in the sink, I realized what had burned. It was my Aunt Lottie’s apron. It was really old. It was a precious memory of my mother’s sister, Lottie, who died at least 40 years ago. No telling how old that apron was. Ten years ago (maybe even five) I would have collapsed on the floor in tears. I loved my “things”, no matter how tattered and worn they were. I was so attached to them that I would mull over in my head what I would grab if there was ever a fire or other disaster (Are any of you relating to this?) But when I caught myself laughing instead of crying, it was a lightbulb moment. Or as Oprah would say, an ah–ha moment. It was okay.

In the last few years (and I’m going to give my meditation practice full credit) I have reached a level of detachment, and no longer fall apart when something breaks, gets lost, or burns in a fire.

While writing this post on spring cleaning-inside and out, the symbolism of the fire wasn’t lost on me. Fire is often symbolic of letting go of what is no longer needed; that which no longer serves us. My (thankfully) little fire reminded me that spring is a great time to clear out the “stuff”, both in my home and in my head that is no longer serving me. I got right down to business, filling up bags of clothes, books and various things, and sending them off to someone who really needs them. And the stuff in my head bogging me down? A pen and my journal are all I need to release the emotional clutter that’s holding me back.

I know you’ve probably read dozens of articles on spring cleaning. I certainly have. But I’m hoping that what motivated me will do the same for you. I guarantee you will feel lighter and more joyful. Here are a few easy tips on self-care spring cleaning:

  • Start with your living space. You will be amazed at how clearing out old, unneeded stuff will make you physically and emotionally feel better. There are all kinds of books or articles on the Internet to help you get started. Clutter Busting by Brooks Palmer is a great resource.
  • Journal your thoughts and feelings on why you’re feeling stuck and unable to move forward. Don’t censor. If you live in fear of someone finding your journal, there are free journaling programs for your computer that are password protected. So, no excuses here. Trash them!
  • Have your own fire ceremony. Write down whatever it is you want to release and burn it safely. (I have stories to tell here, as well!) Even better is to do it with a group of like-minded individuals outside with a safe fire pit.
  • Start cleansing your body by introducing seasonal foods (especially bitter greens) that will naturally detoxify and clear out the channels that may be clogged from a winter of eating heavier, fatty foods. If you can afford it, treat yourself to some spa services, especially those that help drain the lymph and get rid of old dead skin. If money is tight, there are all kinds of self-care treatments you can make right in your own kitchen. Check out The Ultimate Natural Beauty Book by Josephine Fairley or Absolute Beauty by Pratima Raichur.
  • And last but not least (this is a tough one), if there are people in your life who are bringing you down and no longer serving your higher self, let them go gracefully. First and foremost, be true to yourself.

Some people can change their life with one fell swoop. A big move or other life changes don’t seem to phase them. Others need to take baby steps. That’s okay. We’re all different, born under different stars with unique qualities and abilities. But one thing’s for sure–change is inevitable and necessary, or we become stagnate, just as a pond does without the wind to move it around and shift things. What if everything in nature was stationary–can you imagine how awful that would be? Nothing would grow and frankly, we wouldn’t be here anymore. Letting go of fear of change and the unknown can be life-changing and exhilarating, once you take the leap.

Full disclosure: I had already tossed the charred apron into the trash when my friend, Madhavi, suggested that it might be nice to save just a piece of the apron and frame it. So I dug it out of the trash, cut out a small piece, washed it and put it in a frame. Now it hangs above my stove as a reminder to me that letting go is okay. The important thing is that I didn’t NEED it anymore.

Happy cleaning!

Posted in Change of Seasons, Detoxifying, Energy, General Wellness, Inspiration, Self-Care, Spring Cleaning | 6 Comments

Must See: “Hungry For Change”

Posted on March 25, 2012 by

Oh how I wish everyone was rushing to see the amazing new documentary Hungry For Change instead of The Hunger Games. I have been relentlessly telling everyone about this film by the creators of Food Matters. Whether you’re sick, overweight, depressed or just generally unhealthy, this film is for you. In fact, it’s for all of us living in this toxic, chemical–laden world. I consider myself to have some credibility regarding the matter of banishing illness by changing my diet and way of life. Having gone from years spent with debilitating pain from fibromyalgia to a healthier life filled with joy and a strong body, I can attest to everything the makers of Hungry For Change have to say. And it was good for me to watch this film to remind me to get back on track, having fallen off the healthy eating wagon a bit this winter!

Here’s the good news: You don’t have to wait for this film to make its way to your local theater, you can sit down right now and watch it on your computer! In fact, the Hungry For Change folks have generously offered their documentary for free viewing from March 21st until March 31st. Just click here to view the film. I promise you won’t be disappointed. And, if you’re motivated and moved by the film, please spread the word to family and friends. You just might save someone’s life.

Here’s a sneak peak!

Posted in Change, Detoxifying, General Wellness, Nutrition, Resources, Videos | Tagged , , , , | 4 Comments